Something I think it’s always important to point out:  Compared to many, I have been and continue to be damn lucky.

I was fortunate enough to garner some media attention that has brought me opportunities.  True, I’m not in a house/apartment of my own just yet, but I’ve taken tremendous strides forward from the Walmart parking lot, and new possibilities continue to pop up here and there.  I am light years ahead of where I was, and the vast majority of it is due to sheer, dumb luck.

Not everyone is so lucky.  Most don’t get this kind of media attention, they go unnoticed.  And many are in very dire circumstances, much worse than my own.

It’s a double-edged sword, this good fortune I’ve had.  On the one hand, I’m very woohoo, perhaps my ship is finally coming in! On the other hand, I’m just one person.  It makes it all the more depressing to read about or even receive emails from hundreds more homeless people, many in far more horrible situations than mine ever has been, who need help.  I want to save all of them, and since I clearly can’t, perhaps the best I feel I can do is continue to try to make others aware of their plight, add their voices to my own.

Wooooooooot!  E. Jean got back to me (thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!); my internship starts Sept. 1st!  Best of all, she was kind enough to tailor it to my circumstances by making it an hour a day, 6 days a week, so I still should be able to work a regular job (which is fantastic, since this week I’ve had several places express interest – tomorrow I’m interviewing as Executive Assistant at The Alzheimer’s Association, yay for nonprofit work!  Also have had interest expressed by a celebrity author/animal rights activist (PA), aerospace company (EA) and medical management company (EA).

Sooooo… things are looking up!  Which is great, because it cost quite a bit to fix my car (just finished today) and now Matt and I are running incredibly low on funds (although much better than we would be, thanks to the super-generous people who sent us donations), but it doesn’t even matter right now because I’m so ecstatic!  I have the awesomest internship that will make my CV look fantastic, and I’m likely to get a decent-paying  job within the week 

Poor Matt.  He’s been such a trouper.  I woke him up this morning gasping/screaming/flailing madly, having stumbled upon my own story on Save The Assistants (awesome blog run by awesome people; I highly recommend checking it out!)  Poor guy bolted upright all bleary-eyed and panicked, terrified that something was horribly, deathly wrong.  He was a very good sport about it though, and he’s very happy for me, though I’ve been ignoring him all day in favor of job applications, internship freakouts on FB and Twitter, and picking up propane/milk for us.  So I think I should probably sign off now and go give him some attention and cuddles.

Cheers and much love to my readers!

~Bri

Holy shyte!  http://www.elle.com/content/view/full/325607

It would seem I’m almost a month late to the party, but remember that reality show I applied to waaaaay back, I think in April-ish?  The advice columnist one that I totally bombed?  It was for a competition whose prize included an internship with Elle Magazine’s own E. Jean (winner in my books of Awesomest Feisty Redhead EVAAAAAR – runner up is Judge Marilyn Milian of People’s Court).

Well, I wrote a quasi-humorous appeal to E. Jean after my Utter Fail, and it turns out that she wrote back!  Or rather, she published my note in her column, and responded with some awesome advice as well as an offer of a four-month telecommuting internship (one hour a day, six days a week) working for her!  Which is absolute amazingness and insanity!!!!!!!

So, now I’m panicking, hoping that I didn’t absolutely botch things by not finding out about this sooner… The first I read of it was today, and the column was published back on July 24th.  With all the setbacks Matt and I have been besought by lately, I haven’t had as much time to spend online, and the time I have had has been spent looking for work nonstop.

I am absolutely ready and raring to go, if the offer hasn’t yet been rescinded.  I shot an e-mail to E. Jean and am crossing my fingers, toes, eyes (everything crossable) that she isn’t completely offended that I didn’t answer back earlier, which of course I totally would have if I had known!  This is seriously a super-amazing opportunity, andI’m praying that I haven’t blown it (and believe me, when you’re an agnostic atheist, praying only comes in those rare hours of utter despair – i.e., when you really really really want a favor).

So E. Jean, if you get my e-mail or read this, a zillion bajillion thanks for the incredible offer and I would love to accept, assuming you haven’t yet written me off.

(……..squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!)

~Bri

So many wonderful people have asked/insisted that I let them know where/how to donate to help get me out of this jam.  I hate feeling like an e-panhandler and said “no thank you” to more people than I can count, but it’s a tribute to just how kind-hearted my readers are that they just won’t take no for an answer.

So, if you really would like to help, please PayPal donations to mdbarnes@hotmail.co.uk, or you can snail mail them to:  P.O. Box 1242, Brea, CA  92822-1242.  If you absolutely require my full name because you need to make out a check or money order, please contact me privately at info@girlsguidetohomelessness.com.  I get really nervous about giving out all of my info online.

Also, many have asked where to send expressions of outrage to Walmart.

You can call the Walmart Ethics line at:  1-800-WM-ETHIC

You can e-mail Walmart using their online form here:  http://walmartstores.com/contactus/feedback.aspx

You can snail-mail Walmart’s corporate headquarters at:  Walmart Stores, Inc., 702 SW 8th Street, Bentonville, Arkansas 72716-8611

Again, thank you so much to all of the kind readers who are so concerned for Matt and I!  All who offer assistance to us, please let me know who you are so I can send you a hand-written thank you card from the two of us.  We wish that we could do more, and we just want to make sure that you know how grateful we are.

* * * * *

And now for updates… hi all!  I’m so sorry I haven’t been around a few days to let everyone know what’s going on.  Things have just been crazy and I haven’t had the time.  The turbocharger in my car decided to give out on the freeway on the way to an interview Thursday.  Luckily, the car continued to run until I got to the interview.  Afterwards, I went to a couple of autobody shops on the same street and was advised that the car should make it “home”, but not much further than that.  The last 7 miles of the way back, the car suddenly started making a grinding noises in addition to the high-pitched screaming whine of the shot turbocharger.  By the time I arrived at my destination, blue smoke was billowing out of the exhaust pipe.  Just barely made it.

The thing that bugs me most about this is that the car is only 4 years old and has only 56K miles on it (I should also point out that I’ve only had it for 2 years and only put 20K of those miles on it – I don’t drive my car hard or far at all).  NOTHING should go wrong with a car that new and with that few miles on it, much less something major like the turbocharger.

So now, a mechanic friend has been kind enough to locate a part for me.  The part is very expensive (but still about half the cost the autobody shop wanted to charge); with labor, it will cost at least the same amount to fix my car as it will to get the trailer out (the cost of which is increasing daily).  If we can manage to get the truck/trailer out of impound, we have been offered a place on private property to park it for very little money, so that is our goal.  However, the cost is increasing by $80 daily so we need to come up with a plan quickly.  We have heard nothing from Walmart yet.

However, job prospects are looking less-than-godawful.  Despite reading in today’s L.A. Times that unemployment in California has skyrocketed to 11.9% as the national rate declines to 9.4% (a post-WWII high for the state), I seem to be getting relatively decent results interview-wise.  Before the recession/depression we’re in now, I never had trouble getting jobs.  EVER.  I landed every interview I applied for, and was offered every job that I ever interviewed for.  It took me a matter of weeks or even days to find a new job.  Life was good.  But then, after layoffs, over the progress of 8 months of searching I landed only two interview requests (one of which offered me the job).  However, the past five days I have stayed up all day and most of the evenings (usually finally conking out around 4 a.m.) applying to hundreds of positions and have actually received 5 or 6 responses so far.  Besides the interview on Thursday (in West Covina), I now have one on Monday (in San Diego) and one on Tuesday (in Irvine).  Yes, I’m applying all over SoCal.  Please cross your fingers for me!  We were doing so well; we had a “cushion” of savings and were hoping to soon find an apartment, but then came the issues with the truck/trailer/car, the cushion vanished practically overnight and we’re back to square one.

So… all positive vibes are much appreciated.  Most of all, we are grateful for the outpouring of moral support we have received.  Thanks again to all.

Cheers!

~Bri (and Matt)

So, I’ve got about 3 separate blogs I need to write and post within the next day or so Here’s the first.

I came across an ad last week looking for writers/fashionistas to do an advice columnist competition. I believe they were specifically looking for “the Next Carrie Bradshaw”. OK, I have to admit, I’ve never seen a single episode of “Sex and the City”.  Yes, I’m a traitor to my gender.

*pauses and waits for female readers to start slinging Manolos at me*

In any case, I figured I’d send in a quick letter anyway with my story, and see what happened. I mean, I’m less of a writer than a blogger, but I do love writing, and I love fashion, especially vintage and retro clothing. I bet I could out-cute SJP and her super-overpaid stylist any day, haha. In any case, it was a shot in the dark and I was quite certain I’d never hear back from them.

…a certain chika was called in for a screen test this week. Guess who? (hint: me!!!!!)

Of course, I found out over the phone just who these people were.  What I thought might be a dinky little unknown show, that might present me with some small oppportunity… turned out to be by Fremantle Media.  The American Idol/America’s Got Talent/Etc. guys.  the guys with all the clout.  With millions of viewers.  And the prize?  An internship at Elle magazine, being mentored by a very funny, slightly crazy, super-awesome columnist whom I’ve read for years.

Holy shite.

I went into the Fremantle Media offices and there were a lot of random actors sitting in the lobby, waiting to try out for a different project (a TV sitcom or something).  I was wearing the most adorable, brightest vintage ’50s dress I could dig up and I got a lot of funny looks.  A tall, rail-skinny chick stood in the corner, gesticulating and mouthing lines.  I was the only one there for the advice columnist show, so I started filling out my application and waiting for the casting director to show up.

This scary actor lady came into the lobby and sat next to me.  She was a bit older, in her forties or fifties.  She was like Carol Brady on crack. It looked like her plastic surgeon had had a field day with her – her eyes were open too wide and her smile was frozen in place.  She talked WAY too loud.  In the quiet lobby, her voice reverberated and echoed and people started staring at her.

“OH AREN’T YOU ADORABLE!!!!! WHAT A PRETTY DRESS!!!!!  EVERYONE LIKES TO GO OVER THEIR LINES WHILE THEY’RE WAITING, BUT I’VE FOUND THAT IT’S BETTER TO JUST STAY MYSELF AND INTERACT WITH THE OTHER ACTORS!”

I mumbled that I wasn’t an actor, hoping she’d go away, or at least take the hint and talk at the room level, which was at about a whisper.  After interrogating me about what I was there trying out for, and making sure the entire room knew that I was a) a “reality girl” and b) not an actor, never acted in anything besides a high school play…  she grabbed my half-completed application and started reading the questions aloud.

“LET’S SEE… ‘WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?’”

She looked at me expectantly, and I realized she actually wanted my answer.  I drily informed her that I was crying on the inside, right now.  In a way, it was more true than she could have realized, but she laughed and took it as a joke.

“OK, HOW ABOUT THIS ONE: ‘WHAT ARE 3 THINGS ABOUT YOURSELF THAT YOU NEVER REVEAL TO SOMEONE YOU’VE JUST MET?!’”

Ehrm… right, like I’m going to tell you, lady?  You’re already announcing my life story to the entire room.

“‘NAME A TIME WHEN YOU GAVE BAD ADVICE?!’”

At this point, I was thoroughly psyched out and ready to either break down into tears or else kill this woman with a smile on my face.  Luckily, I was saved by Peter, the casting director, who came out and called me back.

“OH MY GOD, I LOVE HER!!!  SHE IS JUST SO CUTE!!!!!  SHE JUST TOLD ME SHE’S CRYING ON THE INSIDE RIGHT NOW!” she informed him as I walked through the door.

I could have died.

Of course, I totally bombed it.  I mean, how could I not, I was in such a state of panic and psyched-out-ed-ness, and overwhelmed, and tremendously nervous just realizing the magnitude of even getting called in to test with such a company.  Peter was very nice, sat me down in a chair, turned on a camera and a spotlight (!) – which was a tad intimidating and “tell me where you were on the eve of March 6″.  He asked me a few questions, which I was totally struggling to answer and my mind kept blanking because I was completely freaked out.  He was very sweet about trying to gently guide me into showing a tad more personality, but I think I just sort of shut down.  Later on I thought about all the better answers I could have given, or ways I could have let my personality out more, but in the moment I was just completely stone-petrified.  Poor dude.  He was probably regretting wasting his time calling the homeless chick in, haha.

In any case, after it was over he told me if I heard anything from them in 2 weeks to 2 months, that would be good news, it all depends on the executives, etc. etc.  He told me that I did well (I think he has to say that, haha) and that he tends to look for interesting people over “models”, but that I am beautiful, and other very nice stuff.  Yay for nice casting directors.  Even if I bombed, I can still feel good about it now.  Thank God I wasn’t in a room with a nasty Simon Cowell wannabe or anything.  I think I would have completely crumbled.

I went into the lobby and pushed the “down” button to call the elevator.  Insane Carol Brady Doppelganger cornered me.  “DID YOU JUST GET DONE?!  I JUST GOT DONE!  I’LL TAKE THE ELEVATOR DOWN WITH YOU… YOU DIDN’T WEAR YOUR GLASSES FOR THE SCREEN TEST, DID YOU?  YOU TOOK THEM OFF, RIGHT?!?!?!?!?!”

*sadness*

(…I like my glasses.  They’re a part of me.)

* * * * *

In a clumsily-executed and only quasi-related transition:  Here’s the thing about a lot of actors, I think.  I’ve dated two of them, and it’s like they don’t know when to stop acting.  They’re so self-absorbed and wrapped up in their own head before they can care about anybody else, if they even can at all beyond that peripheral, crucial stage-like interaction.  If they’re interacting with you at all, it’s as if they’re visualizing the encounter on a stage, like trading dialogue.  They say what they feel would be the right thing to say, or would cause the most interesting conflict, rather than what’s real, because even they don’t know what part of them is real and what part is acting.  The vast majority of actors I’ve known are addicted to drama.  My last ex would deny this vehemently.  He always told me he was different, he prided himself on being able to separate his “craft” and his personal life.  And I have to say this about him, up front, he is a brilliant actor.  Fascinating to watch, and a Juilliard finalist.  For all I know, he’s packing his bags right now because he made it in to his dream school.

But again, the thing about actors – it’s so much harder to tell what’s real.  My ex did a fantastic job for two whole months of making me feel happy and secure, like we were having absolutely no problems… meanwhile, he was messing around on me with some floozy slut bitch man-stealing whore of a tart in one of his shows (lest you think I’m being too hard on her and too easy on him, don’t. I’m pretty sure I threw his Christmas present at his head when I found out.  True, it was a pair of tickets in a letter-sized envelope, but still.  Believe me, I know what a lousy, dickwad thing that was for him to do to me).  I can already tell you, if he found this blog and read it, the first thought to go through his head would not be concern at my circumstances.  If anything, it would irk him slightly that more media outlets – TV shows, radio networks, etc. – have expressed an interest in me in two months than ever have in him, so far.  He always seemed to like that romantic, “starving artist” conceptualization of himself.  Doing what he loved, screw practical concerns like food and housing and money.  Of course, it’s really easy to think that way when you still live with your mother (who was actually a truly kind and supportive woman), don’t pay a dime in rent, have a home-cooked meal ready for you every night, and have never been homeless in your life.

Maybe that sounds a little bitter.  And you know what, I’m going to fly in the face of 90% of the world and conventional wisdom and say it’s OK to be a little bitter sometimes.  If you loved and devoted yourself to someone, threw all of your effort and energy into making them happy, thought you were happy, they told you they could never leave you, would be an idiot to leave you… and then you found out it was all a sham, they had been cheating on you and completely negating everything they had ever said, every promise you had ever made to each other?  You know what?  It’s natural and OK to be bitter with that person.  It’s natural and a protection to dislike and mistrust them. Now, you shouldn’t let that bitterness monopolize your life, and you definitely shouldn’t take that mistrust and apply it to all future romantic interests, because that’s unfair.  I trust each and every man that I date until he gives me a reason not to.  That’s only right and fair, that I shouldn’t impose past disappointments on new relationships.  But yes, I am a tad bitter about being cheated on by someone who claimed they didn’t have it in them.  I am wary around actors because my experience dating two of them was so similar.

So, Steven Lords, if you ever stumble across this blog and recognize me… you’re a dirty welcher.  Oh, and if you google phoenixforged47 (your e-mail address) you show up as a member on Actual Incest porn forums.  I’m just saying.  You might want to look into some therapy for that.  That’s a pretty unhealthy fixation and it makes me look back at things in a whole new light.  I mean, that’s really, really sick, actually.  Yuck.

I really should thank Steve, though.  I mean, when it comes down to it, he cleared out of my life and opened up the way for the best possible thing that ever could have happened to me, the love of my life, a real honest-to-god good and upstanding man, the man whom I adore and treasure.  And no, I can’t talk about it any more than that.  Not just yet.  I wish I could, believe me, I’ve been bursting at the seams to for ages, but very soon, I promise.  Sorry to leave you guys dangling.

Well, I’m only three days late with it, but FINALLY figured out how to post the CBC interview with Jennifer Westaway:

I sound very nervous and am talking about a mile a minute, haha.  I got some super sweet comments from Canadian readers, and now I have to set about answering all of them (I like to personally respond to everybody)!  So, if you’ve left me a comment at any point this last week, I’ll have probably responded to it by tonight.  Really.  I swear.

Things have been a tiny bit crazy, there may be problems getting the house and I may need to come up with about $10K more than I currently have, within the next two months, in order to get it.  This means that I will need to look into selling the few remaining possessions that I have, including my antique 1934 baby grand piano, Ingrid… I dumped much of my furniture at a thrift store, but put her and a few other items in storage when this thing began.  I used to think that she would be the one thing I would never be willing to sell, and it breaks my heart to make the decision, but this is my dream house and I need to really take a serious look at what is most important to me and my long-term happiness.  I suppose I could always find another piano… but houses like my Victorian simply don’t exist around here, and I really am head-over-heels in love with it.  At the same time, I could get another piano but not another Ingrid; musical instruments have a sort of life and personality to them and I will miss her terribly.  I imagine she’s quite disappointed at being stored in pieces in the dark for the past few months, and will be even more disappointed that I’ll never play her again.  Or perhaps it’s just anthropomorphization.  In any event, I probably won’t make much off her (nobody is buying pianos at the moment; instruments that would have cost thousands a couple of years ago are going for mere hundreds or even being given away for free on Craigslist now).  I have a few other things that I suppose can go – a book collection of thousands of books (which also breaks my heart) and several hundred DVDs – it may be well over a thousand now, I didn’t really keep track when I was collecting them.  I used to work for Blockbuster Video, can you tell?  In any case, not very good resale value, but perhaps it’ll be something.  I also have the Dodge Ram that I inherited from Bill when he committed suicide.  It’s about 10 years old, and only worth about $2500 max, but it’s something.  It’s currently hooked up to the trailer, but perhaps if I eventually find a month-to-month rooming situation that works to my satisfaction, I can sell it.  I also have a fair amount of vintage clothing left, which I used to sell a lot of, so I’m thinking of starting to sell off the nicest pieces.  Still, not much of a resale market for vintage with this economy, but I’ll do whatever I can.  I will NOT lose this house.  I CANNOT.

I’m also gonna have to take a hard look and figure out exactly where I want to take tGGtH at this point.  I feel like I’ve veered off the original intent, which was survival tips and advice and resources.  I seem to be posting more and more personal stories about my daily life, which I’m not ENTIRELY averse to, but somehow I feel like perhaps I might eventually come off as whining about my life, when the original intent of the blog was to help others.  So I may want to start including more topical/homeless news/tips/links to resources type postings.  Thoughts or impressions?  What I want most out of this thing is to help others even in a small way, and also do my part to put the issue on the map.

Also, just curious… any of you guys think I could ever pass as an advice columnist?  The idea recently came to my attention and I find it somewhat intriguing, although unsure as to whether I may be the type.

Onwards I forage – to the comments!!!!!!