My gawd. Seriously, it is so fantastic to have ex-JW moles and spies to pass on news to me about my family.
Oh, Brittany. Brittany, Brittany, Brittany. Although you may not believe it, I love you so. Truly. Yet, your hypocritical, opportunistic, haughty, Pharisaical, smugly superior ramblings never fail to brighten my life and provide the highlight of my day.
Yes, Brittany and Mom, I know you still check up on me via the blog, as well as watching my TV appearances and devouring news articles about me. Which is flattering, really, but must I remind you that this is an “apostate” website, via your own terminology? Don’t you know that someone could report Brittany Karp and Tina Karp to your “elders” at the Los Alamitos, CA and Flagstaff, AZ congregations of Jehovah’s Witnesses and they could hold a “judicial committee” (kangaroo court) to wield their self-imposed, non-existent power over you and “disfellowship” you for repeatedly disobeying “Society” edicts against apostate material?
But enough of the silliness. The real news here is that my sister and mother, having skimmed the recent post about my New Year’s exploits, have apparently “read between the lines” and decided that I am clearly involved in…
*pause for dramatic effect*
“substance abuse!!!” (**omgwtfSATANISM!!!!!**)
……………
o.O
……..BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seriously, a couple years ago, something like this still would have stung, but now I’m able to find it absolutely hilarious.
You see, Jehovah’s Witnesses desperately need to believe that “apostates” like myself are suffering. That the “world” outside the safe, comforting haven of the bOrg will shred them to bits and spit them out. That they will “reap what they sow”, if you will.
The most likely explanation for me spending a night in a snowy climate? Probably that I went to Scotland to surprise Matt for the holidays, and that, backfiring on my brilliant plan, he simply wasn’t home on New Year’s Eve… so I went to stay at the local train station awaiting his return. And, in fact, that’s the truth of it.
Never mind, though, that subzero temperatures cause hypothermia (which I’ve already mentioned that I had caught), which in turn causes hallucination and eventual passing out. No, clearly I’m too far down Satan’s road, and my hallucinations and passing out were caused by *gasp* ACID!!!!! And that’s not even the least of my problems. In fact, when I’m not toking up or imbibing cocaine like candy, I’m conjuring up demons on my very own Ouija board… nothing like a little late-night demonic possession to spice up my life before ARMAGEDDON dooms me forever and the crows pick out my rotting eyeballs.
…In reality, I’ve never taken a drug in my life, unless you count Tylenol. And the occasional sip of Smirnoff, but hey, my mom’s been giving me that since I was about 14 (go JWs and their overwhelmingly prevalent abuse of the one Biblically sanctioned drug, especially by repressed Witness housewives! It’s just like the ’50s all over again! Hooray!)
Meanwhile, as far as alcohol goes, I can count exactly twice in my life I’ve been even mildly drunk, and that was more of a social thing, because here’s a little secret: alcohol, and anything else mind-altering, just doesn’t really do it for me. I’ve always been much happier without needing to resort to anything that changes or dulls my perception or personality. I (shocking spoiler alert ahead!) like who I am and don’t feel any need to forget that.
“Oh, yeah, right!” the JWs sniff. ”That’s just what a disgusting, God-defying, little drug addict WOULD say!”
…Er, sure? But seriously, no. Never done drugs. For all my faults, I was never interested.
Premarital sex? Oh, hell, yeah. Absolutely. Not sorry, either. Guilty as charged. Go ahead and smite me, Jehovah, and I’ll go down with a smile on my face – because it felt FANTASTIC.
But drugs, nope.
Overall, it doesn’t matter though, does it? It is important for a Jehovah’s Witness to *know* the horrors that inevitably befall those eeeeeeeevil apostates. Because that’s how the Watchtower Society keeps the rank-and-file in line. This could happen to you. Satan could overtake you easily, without you even realizing it, and then you’ll become one of THEM, will have committed the one unpardonable sin of LEAVING. Surely a specially torturous death awaits the apostates who have knowingly declared war upon God. It’s the JW equivalent of the boogeyman.
Actual JW literature artwork of apostates destroyed at Armageddon. I like to think that I'm the one holding her innocent daughter, who will doubtless be destroyed as well by the "fair and just" god Jehovah. Along with random cats, apparently.
The truth is that lately my life is, with the odd exception, pretty mundane and pleasant about 98% of the time. I don’t practice “demonism” (see, that would require me to actually believe in demons or in Satan, or in any kind of spirit realm whatsoever, which I don’t), I don’t do drugs, and I practice monogamy in a loving relationship. I haven’t the slightest interest in declaring “war” on a God that I don’t believe in, although I sure wouldn’t mind seeing the Governing Body™ of the Jehovah’s Witnesses, the puppet masters if you will, crumble (they’re the ones I dislike, not the regular rank-and-file who, for the most part, are regular people simply believing what they’re told… not the brightest bunch, and usually blind to their own hypocrisy and doctrine/reasoning flaws, but for the most part friendly, amiable people). But it’s not something I’m going out of my way to care about one way or the other. I just want to live my life happily and be a good person.
But none of that will stop a dedicated Jehovah’s Witness from recoiling at the sight of me, once they know I’m an “apostate”.
Never going to happen. Boooooo.
You see, “apostates” are even worse than someone who is “disfellowshipped”, or excommunicated, from the Jehovah’s Witness cult. An “apostate” is somebody who “had the Truth™ and turned away from Jehovah anyway”. ”Apostates” ostensibly *know* that Jehovah is “the One True God™” and is going to destroy the wicked at ARMAGEDDON, and that only the Jehovah’s Witnesses will be left to frolic in a beautiful paradise earth with pandas and lions (and, I hoped as a child, gorillas and killer whales…because they’re awesome!)
So, “apostates” randomly decide that even though they *know* the Truth™, they are going to join Satan and smear Jehovah’s name with lies, etc. etc. Why exactly do they do this? Because they’re possessed by the Devil, apparently. Possessed and scary and liars. How do the JWs know that they’re lying, if they refuse to listen to anything they have to say? Because the Watchtower Society tells them so.
More JW artwork of "God's Glorious Day of Judgment"
Er, riiiiight.
I stopped counting the number of times I was told, as an angsty kid in my teens/early 20s… “but you *knoooooow* it’s the Truth™!!!!!”
Eventually, I stopped saying “yes, I know” and would only sit there silently, allowing the speaker to infer that I agreed with them. Because you know what? I didn’t know that. I haven’t known that for a long time. In fact, I’ve become increasingly positive that it’s not the Truth™, and once I figured out that the Paradise earth where I could have a pet orca was complete B.S., it was pretty pointless to continue the charade. I’m happy no longer wasting my life on it.
More JW armageddon porn. Note the child holding her doll and the puppy plummeting into the abyss. Apparently, they too are dangerous apostates (a"pup"states?) that Jehovah must destroy, in order to cleanse the Earth of all wickedness.
You’ll never find a Witness out there that believes that, though, or at least not one that will admit it to themselves. Jehovah’s Witnesses are masters of hearing and believing only what they want to, only what they’re told to. ”Independent thought” is considered a Satanic trait, clearly stated as such (and often) in Watchtower literature. Jehovah’s Witnesses are counselled to be like meek (read: dumb) sheep – following exactly where they are led without really knowing why.
To tell you the truth, I’m not really sure whether my family keeps checking up on me because there’s still a sliver of them that loves me (although they are counselled by the Watchtower Society to “abhor” and “loathe” me for my “wickedness”), or because they’re hoping for the entertainment value of what they consider to be an inevitable trainwreck. Although, I think back on all of the times that my mother called me “Satan’s daughter” or told me, as she was beating me, that I should be grateful I wasn’t an ancient Hebrew because “then the Bible would have allowed me to stone you to death”… and I suspect it’s the latter. Again; used to be painful, now just hilarious to me. They say that living well is the best revenge. If I were interested in revenge (I’m not), I suppose I could say that I’ve achieved it.
* * * * *
But yeah, the overall point is that in their eyes, I am a deeply unhappy person bent on an irreversible path of self-destruction. I still *know* that the Jehovah’s Witnesses have the One True Religion™, and any statements to the contrary are merely “lies”. I *know* that Jehovah is going to destroy me, so I have taken up a personal attack against him, along with my “father” Satan.
So of course, in the great leap of logical fallacy that defines JW thinking, this also means that I am on drugs. Because I’m unequivocally stating that I’ve never done drugs… and everybody knows that apostates only speak outright lies.
Yours in sisterly agape love, Sister Shiny Happy Friendly Neighborhood Apostate (and her demonic alter ego, Sasha HellaFierce)
You crazy sinner, you! LOL
I try
Oh Bri.
I read the first couple of paragraphs and was already LOLing at work. It’s interesting how this all happens. You know I’m a Christian (part of the Evangelical Covenant Church), I believe God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, but what this group of people does to the poor souls – yes I am talking about your sister and mother – is quite saddening and is possibly the work of the devil (which they are blinded to see). Maybe, one day, *THEY* will come to the light, just like you, and see that what the Watchtower Society has done to them is actually evil and the “elders” (should that be TM’d too, because I guess many of the sayings are trademarked haha) are the ones that will be the ones on the ground, in the pit, and falling down the never-ending hole in those JW pictures you posted.
You’re a wonderful and strong woman and I’m happy that you have found comedy in this whole ordeal. I hope that God has mercy on them.
–Tim
I’m keeping my fingers crossed that NOBODY ends up in a bottomless pit, including my family
Touché! That would be best!
Horns need to be bigger. ; )
Bigger, eh? Dare we say… Tim Curry-esque?
Haha, this is fifteen kinds of awesome. I love the demonized photo at the end especially, and of course Mr. Curry
Why, thank you! That photo of me is completely undoctored
Nice angle, yes?
…Ya gotta love Tim Curry. And “Legend”.
Glad you’re alright! We were worried about you for a bit (not b/c of the alleged drugs – the hypothermia!)
It’s just amazing how people can be so judgemental. You are incredible, talented, smart and lovable! It’s sad because they are your family, but they are toxic to your peace in this world. You are a strong woman. And a wonderful writer. They are truly missing out. Oh wait, they still read your blog. I guess there is something wrong with them as they haven’t wiped the dust fro
their shoes. So sad.
Hi Lurker – thanks, I’m safe and warm at the moment
Hey Leigh Ann, you’re very kind – thank you (also, I love your blog)!
Bri, one of the saddest things for me to face in this life is that my family will never be emotionally available – they are simply not capable of it. And, after a life-time of living around that, maybe neither am I – tragic. I can only imagine that all of this needless hurtfulness, at the hands of your family, must be incredibly painful for you.
Like you, I tend to have that “stiff upper lip” and will not be caught suffering, lest they somehow think they have “won.”
One of the things about substances is that one tends to lose control, when using them. Personally, I like being in control too much to use drugs. Apparently, food is my “drug of choice.”
Mystery, Magic, & Miracles,
Rev. Cynthia
Glad to see you back posting, and that the hypothermia incident was a one-off thing. You are tough, but no one is tougher than Mother Nature!
Now, we need a post on what’s going on with you in work, home, and love.
I knew JW was a cult, but I had no idea how much damage it did to it’s members. Thanks for shedding some light on this…wow. I’m an evangelical Christian (so I too believe in God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit), but I also believe in God’s LOVE. It saddens me that anyone could treat their child/ren in such a hateful way, and follow their religion blindly without seeking answers for any questions they have. This I do regularly, when questions do come up. Thankfully, my pastors and teachers WELCOME questions because that’s the only way you can grow…it’s like receiving a college education. You don’t know everything or anything at all until you ask questions and get answers! It astounds me that anyone could blindly follow the JW route without seeking answers, but then again, I guess sometimes that’s just easier. Anyhow, I’m so sorry you had to grow up like this. It absolutely breaks my heart that you did not get to grow up in a loving home…I see now that I take my loving family for granted.
Wow…… Im J.W and this article made me look like a sadist! To be honest but not rude your sister and mother are not true J.W’S , for one the main rule we are taught is to never judge anyone no matter WHAT RELIGION! We kinda look at that as a sin to judge someone. Im sorry you saw false teaching’s of J.W and if I were you I would tell your family to find another place cause it sounds like she’s being taught by a new JIM JONES! (:-O) We dont believe in a bottomless “pit” or “hell” (made up by catholics by the way to earn money) but you are sorta right about the evil being destroyed, but “true” evil, people like Hitler, jim jones, Pharaohs during christ times and etc. We believe in Jesus christ unlike people portray us not to. Sometimes it hurts to see all the lies being said about us, we portray god as a loving god not a invincible killing Conan (love that movie though!) lol but seriously dont be fooled, A real J.W is humble, always in good spirit, never downs anyone, loving and cares for every type of life (even that possom who tears up your trash lol) and its funny, my hall just had a meeting sunday about those pics being put in the watchtower, whoever let them put those pics in the watchtower should be disfellowshiped that is not how it should be portrayed, it should have been “real evil” being destroyed not humans who make MISTAKES, if you dont get what I mean by that sit on it for a min. Much love!
PS. apostates really means the followers of the devil, people who LOVE to do evil, as I said before Hitler etc. also in the bible it says evil will portray its self as a sheep, in other words we just mean be careful,Hitler posed to be a christian until he got in office then you know what he did, I speak of him because my great aunt was a jew and she died last year with the holocaust numbers still inked in her wrist to remind her that evil sometimes portrays its self as a sheep…food for thought
Hi Charles,
All I’m going to say is that you sound pretty young. I encourage you to research your religion from outside sources, not just what they tell you in the meetings and the Watchtower literature. You’ll believe I’m an apostate for saying this, or someone trying to lead you astray. But I’m not. I only hope that you can be helped.
I know that the Society tells you not to read what other books and websites have to say about Jehovah’s Witnesses. But this is because you will be very, very surprised and shocked if you do. If you ever come back to my site, I hope that you take my plea to heart and do some research.
For instance, did you know that the JWs have the highest turnover rate of any religion? Or that they were registered as an NGO with the U.N. that they speak out against, until they were caught a couple of years ago? Or that they meet all 8 criteria of a high-control cult? Or that pedophilia is rampant in the Kingdom Halls and swept under the rug?
http://www.jwfacts.com/
http://www.silentlambs.org
Please don’t take my word for it, or the Watchtower’s. Research and find the proof for yourself. I spent years doing so.
~Bri
Hi Bri
Yes im young and no I dont need to do any research because if you understood my simple but long p.s at the end you would understand I just was trying to tell you thats not the REAL TEACHINGS. It is wrong doing in EVERY religion, its pedophiles in catholics, its pedophiles in baptist, people call catholics a cult, people call hundu’s a cult, thats everywhere if you understood my food for thought, I was trying to say “the goat will play as a sheep” I dont think you get me because you are just talking about JW’S. Look on tv and see how many pastors touch boys, its sick but it doesnt mean you down the whole religion, I dont understand how I can be in a high controled cult when I only read the old testament, try to live sin free, and respect any person I meet, as long with everyone else at my hall.(NOT SAYING YOU SAY IM IN A CULT) See the problem with the world is its too much, how should I say this, GULLIBLE PEOPLE, not saying you but the world in general. Im 20 yrs.old im a R.N and I know more than you would imagine I would. To be honest I was just like you, I can tell you are a person who is in some pain from past family problems the way you down JW’S in almost a full page. (im also back in school for psychology:-D) I had family down me but just not as bad as your mother which I feel hurt because she is not being a true JW to say those things she did you wrote in the article. Mainly what im saying is people will down and criticize people till the end of time, hell, if I believed everything I researched I would be angry at every jew I saw also my passing aunt because jesus was killed by jews, what im saying is its not about religion, nor its about who’s better than who, its about moving the good from the bad in life, just cause a pastor touches a boy doesnt give the right to blow up the church or say this religion is a cult or satanic, no, the pastor is wrong and everyone who liked it. Yes I know its some Bad Halls just like its bad in other religion, but its nothing you can do about a bad person who teaches the wrong things but walk away from it.. Thats what I meant when I tried to give you food for thought, I dont care what religion your in or what race you are, if your a good person at heart I will keep you around thats how you have to live life and that the TRUE side of JW. Life is a test and you overcame your test with being homeless and never giving up on life, and even though I dont know you I would share my last meal for that because I respect you took it on the chin and kept striving. If the you still didnt get what im saying this quote will say it all “its not about he say she say, its not about pen and paper, its not about the clothes or the hair, but its about the heart and mind, and the person who’s breathing the air” People can down my religion and called us “cults” or “pedophilla” all they want but as long as I keep living life right and cherish everything I was given, Im pretty sure I will be in everlasting paradise like every other good hunman being. Focus on you Bri, I read your story and you came a long way, you almost lost everything and you still stand strong, let past be past and problems exit with every breath, life is a test and you are headed down the right road Just worry about YOU, your problems with your family made you go back down a road you left alone cause I felt it in your words on the article, keep focus and keep the haters away, now thats how a REAL JW would talk to you.
in the words of my homie spock
Live Long and prosper lol
I think you’re a good person who doesn’t know very much about your own religion and will probably be disfellowshipped and shunned at some point (because much of what you say, while well-meaning, loving and kind, is not in line with JW doctrine). If an elder were to read the two comments that you wrote above, you’d probably be counseled, and I think you know that. Also, you’re incorrect as to the definition of “apostate”, both the “worldly” definition and the JW definition. Look it up. According to them, I am indeed an “apostate”, and I’m no Hitler, nor am I evil or Satan-possessed. But if you don’t believe me, go ahead, print out your comments and my comments, and take them to an Elder and ask him. You may be surprised at how quickly someone you’ve known your whole life, someone that you believed loves you and is on your side, will turn on you as if you were dangerous, or will ream you for reading material about the JWs outside of what is sanctioned.
And yes, I do agree with you that all religions have major problems – including JWs. I became a humanist/agnostic atheist because I figured out that JWs are NOT the “one true religion” as they claim. I don’t just speak out against JWs (though they are the ones that I have the most experience with, obviously), I will speak out against ANY religion that does bad things in the name of God. I believe that ALL religions have cultish aspects to them. But in a nutshell, if you want to know whether you’re in a high-control cult…look at how easy it is to leave. What if you’re like me, and you believe it’s possible to lead a good life and be a good person without agreeing with all of the JW doctrine? If I were a Catholic or a Protestant, I could say, “mom, dad, I don’t agree with this anymore and I think I’m going to go my own way.” Sure, they might not be happy, but they’re also not required to disown me like JWs are. They would keep on loving me and being my family. You know full well that JWs disfellowship anyone who decides they don’t believe in it anymore, and that’s hardly loving.
Your own Awake! issue of July 2009 said that: “God allows each person the freedom to choose how he or she will respond. No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family.” Really? So then why does the Society force every single disfellowshipped person and his/her family to choose between their beliefs and their family? Do you honestly not find that hypocritical?
The moment you say “no, I don’t need to do research” then pretty much everything that follows is invalidated, sorry. We ALL need to do research. Saying “oh, you just got screwed by a couple of bad people in a bad Hall” is not true. If it were just a couple of bad eggs, then perhaps it could be overlooked. But the point is that it’s not most rank-and-file JWs that I have a problem with. I think most of them are like you – nice people who believe that they’re loving and doing the right thing, and also believe that the 9 old men in Brooklyn telling them how to live their lives are spoken to by God. They’re not. It’s the ones in charge that I have a problem with. The Governing Body. They’ve lied to you more than they will ever tell you, and more than you will ever know, unless you do your own research and figure it out.
The things that I’m telling you, such as the U.N., etc., are not simply things made up by a few apostates. They are verifiable by legal documents, newspapers, or even the Watchtower themselves (it’s amazing, the crazy things you can find when you read older issues of the Watchtower that contradict the newer ones).
For instance, did you know that Charles Taze Russell, the FOUNDER of your religion, was into spiritism, numerology, pyramidology, and freemasonry? These are all things that would be considered demonic by the JWs today, yet he used them in the calculations for forming his religion. Don’t believe me? Take a look at his gravesite. He had a huge monument built as his gravestone. It’s a pyramid, covered in freemason symbols, along with the words “Watchtower Bible and Tract Society”. It’s easy enough to verify, so look it up!
Did you know that the second president of the Watchtower Society, Judge Rutherford, was not the kind man that they claim him to be in the literature, but a drunk and a womanizer? Don’t take my word for it, there’s plenty of historical evidence, including evidence that comes FROM HIS OWN MOUTH. Did you know that Rutherford and the Society built a grand, lavish mansion in San Diego during the Great Depression, telling the JWs that it was for the prophets who were going to be resurrected, to live in? They said that prophets like Abraham, Isaac, etc. would be returning within a year or two and would need a place to stay. Meanwhile, Rutherford lived in the mansion HIMSELF while the rest of the JWs struggled during the Great Depression. The mansion was called Beth-Sarim. JWs don’t know about it because the Society doesn’t put THAT in their history books. But again, easy to verify. There are legal documents, titles, even newspapers of the time that reported it. This isn’t apostates making up lies. This is all stone-cold verifiable facts. And THAT is why research is important.
I don’t believe everything I research; only what is backed up by hard proof and facts. If I believed everything that I researched, I would believe all of the lies that the GB told me in their literature. It’s ridiculous to believe that 9 men running a billionaire publishing company (who obviously have an agenda) should be blindly believed without evidence or proof.
Yes, I think you’re young. That’s not all a bad thing. It means that you’ve been less indoctrinated than those who have been in longer. It means that there’s probably still time and hope for you. And if you’re visiting an “apostate” website like mine, then it means that you still retain a shred of individuality; that you are willing to do something that the Society tells you not to. I hope you take that and run with it someday. Do the research. As much as they tell you that “independent thought” and “education” are worrying qualities, they’re not. Blindly believing what you’re told and saying “I don’t need to do research”…is.
I have a feeling that you may be “counting time” with your comments…am I wrong? Either way, I’m NOT counting time. Everything I’m telling you, I’m telling you because you seem like a nice person and I want to help you, not because a publishing corporation tells me that if I don’t make a certain number of hours a month, I’ll be destroyed along with everyone else. So ask yourself, which is truly more loving?
Best,
~Bri
P.S. Your most recent comment has been spammed and all further comments from you will go directly into the spam filter, simply because this is my blog, I have content control, and there’s nothing that I find more arrogant, rude, and insulting than ANYONE, Jehovah’s Witness or not, trying to tell me what I deep down believe. You have no right to make the call that “you can tell that deep down, I really do believe in god and know that the Bible/Old Testament is the truth”. I don’t know that, I don’t believe that, and I have always been quite clear about that.
I’m afraid I can’t get any clearer, or more honest, than this: “I don’t believe in Jehovah, I don’t believe in a deity or a higher power, I don’t believe that the Bible is the truth, and I don’t believe that my lack of faith in a god makes me a bad, sinful, or immoral person. I think that most religious people try to be good and kind people, with varying degrees of success, and I don’t have a problem with them as long as they’re not pushing their beliefs on me or others, or attempting to make laws based upon their beliefs that infringe upon my rights to others’ beliefs.”
I take my designation as an atheist just as seriously as you take yours as a JW, if not more so. I am also not arrogant enough to tell others what they believe or attempt to force my beliefs on others, unless they ask me to elaborate upon my beliefs or request to engage in debate. I definitely don’t go to others’ homes or websites like Jehovah’s Witnesses and try to tell them that my way is the RIGHT way or the ONLY way. Because for them, it may not be. And neither is yours. Not by a long shot.
I am always willing to speak with current and former JWs, and even hold constructive debate as long as both sides respect one another. However, the moment you cross that line into hardcore arrogance and dare to tell me what I do and do not believe, you’re not welcome on my blog anymore, so you should go and try to count your time elsewhere. I’m pretty sure that if Jehovah were real, he wouldn’t think that arguing with “apostates” really counts as time spent “witnessing” in “field service”. Nor would any elder. If you truly believe that you have the true religion, and that the Society isn’t a fraud, then the last place you should be is on “apostate” blogs, in defiance of the Watchtower’s mandate. Any elder, in any congregation, will tell you the same. Just ask one. Go ahead. Pick any elder in your congregation, ask them about this convo, and see what their response is. I guarantee they’ll tell you that you should never have gone arguing with a self-identified apostate. If you’re still looking to count time by trying to convert those of us who have already left, then you should join the jehovahs-witness.net discussion boards. Many people on there are more than happy to debate with JW trolls all day long, until they’re blue in the face. But I have more important things to do, like help people who actually need help and want to be helped, and deal with my own life.
Best,
~Bri